Breakfast is the most important meal of the day

9 o'clock he said. Meet you at the market square. We first intended to have coffee before work, but decided to turn it into breakfast while were at it. 9 o'clock and he was waiting nervously on the market square. My arrival was casually almost 5 minutes late, on time would be trying too hard, right?! What if he would be late, I'd be standing there on time, waiting.

I see him from a far distance, I try not to hurry, but feel my legs taking an unknown speed-walking speed. His pearly whites shine in the fresh sunlight and soon enough we give each other a polite, nervous kiss on the cheek and say " hey" in a sultry tone. I grab his hand not knowing where we were about to have breakfast, but he leads the way. He promised me he knew a good place to have breakfast, so I was more than curious. We walk up some creaking old wooden stairs and end up in a loft.

" So this is my place" he said, I look around, mildy impressed. Seems like a settled guy; spacious loft, tighty, stylish. Mild turned into major soon after I saw the breakfast table. I try not to jaw drop. Champagne glasses ready to go, fresh O.J., croissants, bread, eggs, bacon...All you could wish for was there on the table. Rays of sunshine were coming through the window, completing the picture. He asked me if I wanted coffee, " Sure, a latte would be nice". He goes downstairs as I wait upstairs. Stiff I wait in the sofa. I notice some dust on the coffee table. Phewww! What a relief, this was the only indication that this was reality. He came back upstairs with the perfect latte ; 2 sugars and full on steamed milk on top creating the light cloud effect that any caffeine lover dies for. I carefully take a sip. The crystal sugar on top of the foam stuck to my lips. I lick it off in a shy manner, not trying to be overly sexy, of course.

We sit down at the breakfast table, we cheered to us. We shared laughter, ideas, jokes, and opinions.
Ever since then, we share everything, everyday.

This is the story on how we fell in love :) p.s. : Pictures of the lovebirds coming soon!

What shall we do with a drunken sailor?!

Weekly he visits the Italian restaurant I work at. I see him walk by often and each time he glares inside, with a certain craving. When he does come inside, he takes a seat at table 1 or table 2, each time. He hangs his coat across from him, his invisible companion.

He never looks into the menu, and I don´t care take out a piece of paper to write his order, because I know what he wants. He wants a pizza Del Mare and a glass of red wine. Every single week. Sometimes even twice a week. I can tell he is lonely.. Not only by the fact that he comes to eat by himself all the time. No. Also, because he asks extra, extra garlic on his pizza. Almost a filthy amount.

I bring his glass of wine, while the pizza boy is making his pizza. The pizza boy knew as well, the moment he walked in, he started looking for his muscles-squid-lobster-mix and was already in the process of making the pizza. Pizza pops out of the oven and I serve it to his table. The smirk on his face makes me giggle deep inside. The joy of getting his food, is dripping off of his face. His massive sailor beard moves along with his smile, whilst he says `Thank you. With extra garlic right?`. I comfort him by saying, `Yes sir, extra garlic, just for you`. He laughs and starts his feast. I try not to stare too much at him, even though I know he doesn't notice because he is living in his own little world. He is having a muttering monologue accompanied with the occasion laugh bursts.

I start imagining his life... He must have been a sailor on a big ship. He looks exactly like the Iglo fishstick sailor man, only with a longer beard. He has retired, but misses the sea now that he is permanently located on land. As he slices of a piece of his pizza and eats it, you can almost see the seafood come back alive and make his jelly belly go happy. He adds some more salt and pepper. The sneezing starts minutes after that. Each time, over and over again. Up to 5 times in a row. He obviously can´t handle the about of pepper he poured on. Instead of rationing the pepper and avoiding this massive sneeze attack, he sticks with it. Bro´s over hoes. Now that´s what I call friendship. He lost the love of his life due to the life on the sea. Left his wife behind and by years and years spent in the oceans they lost contact. The love for the sea was bigger than the love for love. He regrets it now... But lives by the saying that a mans love goes through the stomach. This is the only thought that soothes him, and justifies his love life loss at the end of the day. He finishes his food and asks for the bill. Gives me a `surprising` 2 Euro tip. He grabs his companion jacket from the other chair across from him, zips up, and leaves. He just mesmerized about his past, in full effect and it was lovely to watch...

Devil´s bliss

Tired from a long day, I was walking home in the dark. Streets were empty, curtains closed. Click, clack, click clack... I was speed walking, ready to get cozy and warm at home. Reflecting about my day, my train of thought got disturbed by a beautiful, loud noise piercing my head. I followed the noise, and got pulled into an old church. I walked in, mildly curious. I saw people´s profile outlined by calming, blue light. Then an angel light dominating the whole room, make it clear to me to put my Maltesers away in my bag, as the sound of the packaging was out of place. I did not mind. Even though I was starving, I was ready to be fed. Jazz band, all black. Instruments shining, complementing the vocalist. A young woman, with long, brown, slightly wavy hair was standing on stage, taking the spotlight. Two feet steadily on the wooden planks, rocking a fiery red dress. She sang with all ease, from low to high, working with her shadows in the back to complement each other. The stage was sponsored by Duvel, a nice Belgian beer. The banners of Duvel covered all corners. Duvel, in Flemish, means devil. The irony of the angelic happening in a holy place, sponsored by the devil was profound. I spontaneously started jazzing around. Half rhythm that I felt , and half because I had to go to the bathroom. My needs led me to leave early, yet with a smile on my face.

Bucketlist

Death is a frightening idea to many of us. To die too soon. To die with regrets. To die in pain. To die alone. To die without having completed your bucketlist.

Since I am soon turning 21, I am convinced that I am getting real old, so I decided it was time to write myself a bucket list.

1. Swim with dolphins. This has been a dream of mine since I was a little child, and I need to do it! They are my all time favorite animal.

2. Go to Japan. Either for vacation or even live there for a few years. The clothing, food, culture and nature speak to me so much. I wanne see and experience it!

3. Own a Harley Davidson. This is my latest obsession. Ahh, the leather outfit that goes with it, the muscular arms that tend to drive it, leather boots. I can´t wait to let my hair feel the breeze when on a Harley low rider. Any future boyfriend has more potential when driving this baby. Yet, letting me drive it...Major score.

4. Write for a fashion magazine. This would be the perfect mix of my interests and passions. Writing, fashion and beauty. This is my dream job. Just the image of me getting home from work, kicking off my Louboutins and opening up my super slick Mac and continuing my review on London Fashion Week. I cannot wait!

5. Las Vegas, Nevada. I.D me, betch. I have little time left for this one, but when 21 it is only appropriate to head to Vegas and spend a filthy amount of money in the casino. This is only so cool when 21. When I turn 22, the coolness of this idea will be dimmed. 

6. Jump out of a cake. Any party planners that need a volunteer, call me. I will be there. I won´t even ask for a slice of the cake. I mean, you can´t have your cake and eat it too.

7. Frost myself. This term is totally taken from How to Loose a Guy in 10 Days. But the idea behind it is, to wear jewellery that could buy you a villa. Even just for an hour is enough. Don't need to own it, just swag around in it for a lil bit.

8. Become a Youtube make up guru sensation. I rarely watch cable tv, because all the so called shows I watch are on Youtube. Pretty much all beauty based. Michelle Phan, Promise Phan, Juicystar07, Chrisellim, Dulcecandy87, Davenmayeda, etc. Most of them took Youtube by storm, and became Youtube-famous over night. You don't need an acting education. You don't need to hand out your CV. No nerve wracking auditions. No getting denied. Anybody can do it.  How 21st century it that?!

9. Try blond hair. I've always wondered what I would look like if I were to have blond hair. So, once I find the courage to try it, and bleach my locks, I will be posting pictures. Hilarious sight, trust.

10. Carnival of Venice, Italy. The carnivals I have been to have been all about wearing wrong outfits, boozin´ till snoozin´, and making a mess of the city. The carnival of Venice is world famous for their class, their outrageously artsy masks and eye for detail. Being overwhelmed by richness, ashamed of your under-dressed smokey eyes. After having seen this madness, I will never dress up like Snow white again.

11. Attend a Victoria's Secret fashion show. I've always been fascinated by the lingerie that they manage to create. But also the models. They are plain flawless! I've only heard good things about their shows, so why not?!

12. Take a ride on the Coca Cola train. The commercials from Coca Cola around Christmas are so always so magical. Any child's dream! This may be one of the most famous trains out there, so I definitely want to ride it one day!

13. Pick up ballet again. I used to dance ballet when I was young, but I stopped. I would love to start doing ballet again, become as flexible as before and dance to classical music with a little tutu on.



I stopped at 13, my lucky number. That is it for now, but a bucket list is infinite, so I will be adding more as I go on with life! I hope this inspired you to write your own bucket list too! Dream big, and follow your dreams... they know the way.

Raised on rock

Ever since I can remember, rock music has been in my life.
As a baby I sang along What's up from the 4 Non Blondes and Radio Gaga from Queen.
Half the fights I had with my sister growing up, were about her music playing so loud in our shared bathroom, that it would put me in a bad mood already before I was properly awake.
Or after going out with my friends, we would sleepover at my house, but unmistakeably did not get eliminated from my dads rock and roll before noon. Oh the headaches...
My dad has a very big music collection of over 2000 Cd's. The biggest genre present in this collection is rock. It's a passion of his to keep busy with music, to try and get the limited edition Cd, or to find bonus tracks that aren't usually on the album.
For me music isn't of such high importance. I never update my Ipod, I don't buy Cd's nor am I aware of new music albums of my favorites (well, cause most of them are dead...). But I do have an outspoken favorite music genre. And it's not rock.

Now, a while ago, my dad asked me if I wanted to join him to the Scorpions concert, final tour. I enthusiastically nodded yes, before even being able to come up with one song from them. I thought " Yey, concert!".  So two weekends ago it was time to rock! By the time of the concert I knew three songs from the Scorpions, Hurricane, Here in my Heart and Wind of Change. My dad took out a Cd,  Moment of Glory, and gave me the book lit to read up on the history of the Scorpions a bit.

In 1965 the Scorpions were started in the Germany based Hanover by Rudolf Schenker. The American influence in the German post-war rock youth scene was apparent. Die deutschen rock kinder at that time loved blue jeans, a good guitar and some heavy rock und roll!
In 1972, the rock band was complete with 4 members and launched their first, official album, Lonesome Crow. This first Cd already gave the public a strong idea of what the Scorpions were about; the piercing voice of Klaus Meine, the incredible guitar play that sings and a dazzling melody that is aimed at international success. Score!
The Scorpions grew to be an international success, from Germany, to America and all the way to Japan (Japan loves them!). 18 albums later, they announced a final tour. The guys who once started in their late teens, are now in their 60s, and have rocked enough. Its a once in a lifetime opportunity to go see such rock gods on stage.

I got my studs on, heavy metal rings on each finger, black eye liner, and left my Louis.We arrive in Antwerp where the concert took place. Long hair, leather jackets, combat boots, tattoos and the smell of beer was uniform. I felt my inner girly Claudia screaming from feeling out of place. And my dad? He was happily reliving his youth. His voice was already a bit hoarse from rocking out in the car. I was mentally prepared to experience the high point of embarrassing parents.

I did turn half deaf after having my dad sing along, literally, every song, and did experience the whole rock on finger thing in the air, headbanging and standing ovations. But, I also did experience rock legends on stage. Rock legends that amazed me, that gave me goosebumps and that knew how to entertain. They stand on stage, as if its a hobby, and as if the electric guitar is part of their body.

I returned home, having a new appreciated for hard rock. It was time to broaden my music culture, and so I did. And I am so happy I did!

Say whaaa?!

One of my previous posts was about me stressing to go and stand in front of a group of students and teach them. Yet, now I am stressing about my first day at work.

A lot has changed this past month, so it is time for a well deserved update. 

I have stopped my studies, and decided to go work. I honestly didn't enjoy going to school, and each day became a drag. I felt like an English man in New York going to school; my classmates looked at my from head to toe each day, had too many comments about the way I dress, and I just did not feel at ease in the place where I spent majority of my days. I am normally a very social, outgoing person, but going to school I was a quit, closed girl. I was the Polish girl, or the special girl, I don't mind those names, but the negative connotation I do mind. I was only going to school to prove to my family that I can, and that I can have a higher education diploma. I wasn't doing it for myself. I decided to put an end to it, and break the news to my parents. The worst part was about to start I thought. Hell was about to break lose. 

I sat down in my room, knowing I should be in a classroom right now, and called my dad with fear and chills running down my body. Had trouble holding my phone. My dad being a man of principle and always aiming for high achievements for himself and his family, I thought the speakers of my phone would blow up once I had him on the phone. I told him to sit down, cause I had to tell him something. I explained him that I am not happy going to school, and that I have made the decision to stop. A pause... And then the angels ran their bells, as my dad told me he wants me to be happy, and if this is not what makes me happy, then I don't need to do it. He told me he doesn't want me doing it for him, or for mom, but for myself. He told me we should talk about it during the weekend and figure out a plan. We ended the conversation, and there was a sigh of relief. But now what? What are my plans?

Living by myself in Amsterdam, and now in Belgium, it is very hard for me to adapt again to the family life with my parents and siblings at home. I knew one thing for sure, I want independence. I am 20 years old, still very young, but I have always been independent, and I think of it as a quality, that has helped me a lot in the past. I had multiple options in my head about how to achieve independence, especially financial independence. For my whole life, my parents have payed for almost everything. Anything I could ask for, they would support me with it. Not that I would snap my fingers and get whatever I wanted, but they always made sure that I had all I needed and more. Taking financial independence from your parents is a big decision to take. After having talked through things, and really sat down to think about what I wanted, I decided I wanted to go work. Soon enough I made a CV, and spent my time handing them out around town. Many said, yes we will call you in a week, or yes come tomorrow for a try out. But no real results. 

A few weeks ago, I decided to hand out some more CVs, in hopes to start of working in a clothing store. I want to continue my focus with fashion. I am certain, now, that I definitely want my future to be fashion. Entering the work world without a higher education diploma can be hard, especially if you want to make it one day. I walked into CoolCat, a funky store for teens and young adults. I knew a few people who have worked for CoolCat, and they could only praise CoolCat. They enjoyed the work, the atmosphere and the people. So I thought, why not. I talk to the lady in the store, and I hand her my CV. She tells me that they are currently not looking for someone, but she will keep my CV just in case. 

I get a call about a week later from CoolCat. The lady on the phone greets me with a happy voice, telling me that she would like to interview me because my CV looks interesting. I grab my goods and go. A 5 minute walk from my house later, I am at the CoolCat store. We go upstairs, and she asks me basic intake interview questions. I left the store with a good feeling, yet bitter sweet because I knew they were not looking for anyone. 

A week passes again, and the same lady calls me up, telling me that they were looking for someone new after all to enrich their team. I am hired! Yes!

She hooks me up with the headquarters in Antwerp for another interview. I enter the headquarters in Antwerp, a beautiful building full with antiques and golden wall decorations. This made it seem only scarier. I sat at a giant table with a lady that was asking me questions in order to find out if I had the qualities for perhaps a leadership position in the company. CoolCat does training's for their employees in Holland in order to build up management skills, team building skills etc. This is a great opportunity, and adds great value to you as an employee. 

 I am so very happy to finally have found a job, and get started with my independent life. I still have to hear back about the interview in Antwerp, so we will have to wait and see about further options about leadership positions, and maybe a training in Holland. 

Now my biggest worries are paying my bills. My parents decided that once I quit my studies, it is time for me to pay everything myself. More than right, if I want an independent life, then you gotta do it right. For now pops saved me, and payed my rent and internet, as I currently am a broke baby. But as soon as I get my paycheck I will be in charge for all of that. 

This is a hard way to learn, but a good way. I am really starting to realize what money is, and what a powerful tool it is to have in your life. Money definitely doesn't buy you happiness, because I am very happy now, but it is frickin handy to have. 

But I am winning the Lottery tomorrow, so all will be good in minutes! Cheers. 

Spoiled fruit

The garden of Eden was once so innocent and glorious. Happiness grew on trees, the smell of rose blossoms and fresh grass filled your nostrils. The sky didn´t have a single dust particle that could disturb your chances at seeing the flawless sunrise each morning. If it would rain, it were golden raindrops landing on the pure land. If there was wind, it was a sigh of naive, young love watching over us with a slight frown at the silliness. There was no storm. Unheard of.

As long as we did what we were told to do, we were in the haze of the garden of Eden. In my story, Eve didn´t get tempted, but Adam did. The tree of good and evil got touched as he took a bite out of a tempting red apple, unfortunately this apple was well diseased. He knew the day he would take a bite out of the forbidden fruit, he will die. Temptation lead his choices, as he ripped the apple off of the tree, behind Eva´s back. Warnings of evil and bad endings by voices did not stop him. He took a bite, enjoyed the juicy taste of secrecy, chew it well, and swallowed it all down with little care. He continued to live and love for days, weeks, months. The apple laid on his stomach like a brick. Yet, Adam´s reasoning was- as long as Eve doesn´t know, it won´t do any harm.

Time passes, and Eve woke up to thunder, for the first time. This was new to her, she didn´t know what it meant, what it was. Angels took her aside, and said, Eve wake up, Adam is lying to you. He touched the forbidden fruit, and didn´t tell you. Eve didn´t want to believe it, yet she had tears running down her face, to even have the slightest chance of this being true, there. She walked around the garden of Eden, looking for Adam. She stumbled upon the apple core that was left under the tree... Adam soon came and knew how to mislead naive Eve. He said that the apple was eaten by insects, not him. Eve took his contrasting hand, wiped her tears with it, and walked to see the sun set.

Eve let go of his hand, as her soul led her to Mokum Alef to find truth. Mokum gave her new insights and she grew mature. She didn´t need the luxury of the holy garden, she didn´t miss it either. She realized that the contrasting hand she was holding in the garden of Eden, was a lying hand. She never wanted to touch this lying hand again. The tears she once shed for that lying hand, turned into gold and brought her more happiness than ever.

She never returned to the garden of Eden. Mokum Alef, I love you for giving me truth.